Ways of Praying Part 4 of 6

                                                   Increasing Your Want-To (1)

 Gratitude
The apostle Paul, who knew something about "all circumstances," once wrote, "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." Contemporary social science research continually underscores the tremendous power that the practice of gratitude carries for human flourishing.  

 

One of the most powerful ways to influence others for Christ is to be the most grateful person in whatever circle of people God has placed you.   So I have begun a practice of regularly writing down five items for which I'm grateful, and then thanking God for them.

 

I find it helps me to make them items that are small and humble. If I'm successful at something, I might feel pleasure in it, but dwelling on it (for me) quickly moves toward ego boosting.  

 

To be helpful, these items don't need to be dramatic but they need to be real enough to produce a surge of joy and thanksgiving in my spirit. It may be a conversation I had with one of my children. It might be the taste of Peet's coffee early in the morning. It might be the sight of Baxter the dog romping in a field; or a good two-iron shot on a golf course. (If you're out in a thunderstorm grab a two-iron, for as Lee Trevino once said, "Even God can't hit a two-iron.")  

 

Then I connect the dots and remember that these are gifts from God, and reflect on how good God is. I find that I naturally want to do this.  

 

Mental hygiene prayer
This is a form of prayer that I've adapted from cognitive therapy. I have done this for the last couple of years—often several times a day. It follows an ABCDE outline:  

 

Antecedent—a circumstance that troubles me. For instance, I get an email complaining about something I’ve done. I name this to God.

 

Beliefs—I write down and confess to God all the troubling beliefs this triggers: "They’re right, I did mess up. I must be disappointing everyone. I'm losing the ability to do my job. People will know I'm a phony."  

 

Consequence of these beliefs—I ask the Spirit to help me understand my own emotions: I feel depressed. Negative about the future. Ashamed  

 

Dispute the beliefs—Together with God I name truths that I can stand on: God (and my mom) still loves me no matter how my job goes. One person's response doesn't mean everyone felt that way. I don't want to be the kind of person whose heart depends on getting “applause” from everybody every week. I want to be the kind of person that lives in freedom.  

 

Energized outcome—I reflect with God on how this prayer brings life to my spirit: I am more hopeful. Less self-preoccupied. I am more encouraged.  

 

I find myself wanting to engage in this form of prayer because it is so genuinely helpful to me in "taking every thought captive." Without it, I can stew over a bad day or someone’s complaint or a troubling meeting with the boss or a conflict with a colleague for a long time.*

 

*excerpted and paraphrased from John Ortberg’s insights for Christianity Today, July 6, 2015.   

 

Tomorrow’s and Sunday’s posts will explore some ways of praying that can increase your want-to.

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