How I've been applying this
series to myself
Friday, January 16, 2015
Jeff Lampl
Jeff Lampl
You
may be tempted to think that since I’m a pastor, all I do all day is commune
with God and ride high on the Holy Spirit.
Before being a pastor I was a teacher.
I cared a lot about my job which means that it was hectic and time
consuming. Well, being a
pastor is the same only more so. This
means that even though I’m in the Bible a lot and read a lot, it’s easy for
all of that to function as ways to distance me from God rather than connect me
to Him. Therefore I need
the series we’re in just as much as you do.
And here’s what I’ve been doing.
I’m
swallowing the pride of trying be the first one to work and last to leave (not
that I always succeed, but when I do it can be a pride thing).
On Wednesdays I’m starting at home, taking my daughter to school at
9:00 and then going to work. On
the one hand it feels lazy and irresponsible, but that’s so ridiculous because
I get the same amount done and it’s slower.
In the midst of that I’m taking more time to be with God in my Day by
Day devotional.
I’m
looking at my to-do list as a one thing at a time thing.
I’m accepting that each thing will take time and I’m doing each thing
with that in mind rather than rushing and always feeling irritated that the to
do took so long. That allows me to
be more attentive to the task at hand,
to others, and to God
I’m
doing my Day by Day devotional most days, and when I don’t get to it for a
certain reason, I’m okay with that, no guilt trip because my time with God is
all day (even though I am mostly not
conscious of God’s “thereness”) not just during the devotional time.
When
I come home at night, I just sit down and talk to Kathy.
We are doing devotional things together at various times as our time
together allows. It seems to
work better for us that way. Were
I coming home to young children I would devote my time and energies to them and
to giving my wife relief from being home with them all day.
That would be my spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1,2)
Maybe
the biggest thing for me is taking the time to be silently alone where my
thoughts, fears, failures, self-condemnation, sins of commission and omission,
hopes, dreams, relational challenges and joys, all of it can surface.
It’s a form of confession for me. Letting
all of me be exposed before all of God. Emotions
can either be brought to God or ignored. The
former will allow God in, the latter will exclude him. In
the past I would typically conclude that kind of time with the awareness of my
shortfall and the need to do better all the stuff I should do to get right with
God. That’s now
changed. And it’s a
revolutionary change. I now conclude
these silent times with Romans 8:1, 31-38 and similar passages that tell me the
Gospel, the Good News, which is that that God does not condemn, that Jesus came
to save, that Jesus already has, that God’s love for me is profound, deep,
unconditional, and can never be removed.
I find that empowering. As
Romans tells us in 1:17, the Gospel is a power.
After quiet times like these, I want
to spend more time with God, not have to.
I feel a strength to get up and face the challenges of the day, I feel a
growing freedom from having to perform
but for noticing others and seeing
their fundamental holiness.
Contemplative
spirituality + emotional awareness and vulnerability before God is indeed a
life-giving combination. I
love God more than I ever have before.
For
more:
follow on Twitter @jefflampl
For
more:
follow on Twitter @jefflampl
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