You Never Marry the Right Person - Part 1

February 10, 2016
Pastor Jeff Lampl

You Never Marry the Right Person
How our culture misunderstands compatibility.
Part 1

Tim Keller writes in his book, The Meaning of Marriage, “In generations past, there was far less talk about “compatibility” and finding the ideal soul-mate”

Keller continues;

“Today we are looking for someone who accepts us as we are and fulfills our desires, and this creates an unrealistic set of expectations that frustrates both the searchers and the searched for.

In John Tierney’s classic humor article “Picky, Picky, Picky” he tries nobly to get us to laugh at the impossible situation our culture has put us in. He recounts many of the reasons his single friends told him they had given up on their recent relationships:

“She mispronounced ‘Goethe.’”
“How could I take him seriously after seeing The Road Less Traveled on his bookshelf?”
“If she would just lose seven pounds.”
“Sure, he’s a partner, but it’s not a big firm. And he wears those short black socks.”
“Well, it started out great ... beautiful face, great body, nice smile. Everything was going fine—until she turned around.” He paused ominously and shook his head. ”... She had dirty elbows.”

In other words, some people in our culture want too much out of a marriage partner. They do not see marriage as two flawed people coming together to create a space of stability, love and consolation, a “haven in a heartless world,” as Christopher Lasch describes it. Rather, they are looking for someone who will accept them as they are, complement their abilities and fulfill their sexual and emotional desires. This will indeed require a woman who is “a novelist/astronaut with a background in fashion modeling,” and the equivalent in a man. A marriage based not on self-denial but on self-fulfillment will require a low- or no-maintenance partner who meets your needs while making almost no claims on you. Simply put—today people are asking far too much in the marriage partner”

How about you?

Are you stuck grieving or complaining about the difference between what you thought were getting in a spouse and what you actually got?    Or maybe you are seeking that perfect “soul mate” who will “complete” you.

I say this in every wedding ceremony that I conduct, “your spouse will not be enough”.   Then I add, “being in love will not hold your marriage together, rather it is the solid walls of marriage commitments kept that will hold your love together”.

Are you fixed on the ideal of marriage or are you ready to accept a real one?

Why I Tithe and Why I Hope That You Do Too - Part 3 of 5

February 9, 2016
Pastor Jeff Lampl

Why I Tithe and Why I Hope That You Do Too
Part 3 of 5

Why I am glad that I was challenged to give 10% of my income to God
and why I yearn so much for every other Christian to tithe too.

“Should people cheat God? Yet you have cheated me!

“But you ask, ‘What do you mean? When did we ever cheat you?’

“You have cheated me of the tithes and offerings due to me.  You are under a curse, for your whole nation has been cheating me.  Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!  Your crops will be abundant, for I will guard them from insects and disease. Your grapes will not fall from the vine before they are ripe,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies.  “Then all nations will call you blessed, for your land will be such a delight,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies.                                                                                                Malachi 3:8-12 (NLT)

In the last book of the Old Testament there is this passage (above) playing out a dialogue between Malachi and God.   in his vision Malachi sees God accusing Israel of cheating Him!  Say what?   So how could people cheat God?  Does this mean that God is .  . . like stingy?    And then . . .  is God vindictive . . . like if we don’t “pay our rent” for our spot on earth, he will curse us?”

But, as always, I learned.   I learned some simple but really, really big things.   I learned (as I still must learn this lesson over and over and over again) that everything (literally everything) that I have on earth is simply the gift of God.   It’s all gift!   That might be the greatest lesson in the world.  One day those three words simply came out of my mouth, “It’s all gift”.    And since that day I have never forgotten them. 

Everything I have and everything that I am is given to me by God.   

That’s first. 

God is a giver and if God created me to be something like him then I need to be a giver too.   However I am a very, very selfish person.  I’m as “me first” as anyone else and I need trained out of that.  

Tithing has helped.   10% is a lot of money, no matter how much you make.    Every check or automatic withdrawal in that amount to your church is an act of trust, that says, “with this check or withdrawal I entrust myself, God, to your provision for me, not my own”

The logic, of course, is this:   If God is provider of everything, not me,  then God’s heart is to get me to entrust myself to Him and when I don’t, in the end, having entrusted myself to myself, I will end up having lost everything.    Is there a bigger consideration for my life than this?    How smart would it be to live for myself, doing quite well for myself in this life thank you, only to come to the end of my life to discover that this life is now over and I missed God and his provision and eternity, for living for myself now always results in living for myself eternally and that eternity is just that, for myself and by myself.    That’s the self-imposed curse from which our Lord wants to save us.

There’s only one place in the whole Bible where God says to us, “test me”.   and it’s with our tithes!  

So, I am praying that if you haven’t done so that you take God’s challenge!    It’s a door opener to the blessed life of God.    And you may have noticed in verse 12 that when you do others see God through you!

Tune in next week  to learn more about “why I am a tither and I hope you are too”

(for parts one and two of this series click here and here)

Use It Up, Wear It Out, Make It Do or Do Without

February 8, 2016
Pastor Jeff Lampl

(Jesus) told them this story: "The farm of a certain rich man produced a terrific crop.  He talked to himself: 'What can I do? My barn isn't big enough for this harvest.'  Then he said, 'Here's what I'll do: I'll tear down my barns and build bigger ones. Then I'll gather in all my grain and goods,  and I'll say to myself, Self, you've done well! You've got it made and can now retire. Take it easy and have the time of your life!'  "Just then God showed up and said, 'Fool! Tonight you die. And your barn full of goods—who gets it?'  "That's what happens when you fill your barn with Self and not with God." Luke 12:16-21 (MSG)

During World War 2, our nation’s leaders used the slogan pictured above to encourage people to save, practice frugality, to “make do”, so that they would have enough for themselves, but also so that they wouldn’t hoard scarce resources at the expense of others.

Hoarding is not saving.  Hoarding is all about self.  The rich man in Jesus’ story was a certain kind of hoarder.  Some would say he was simply investing as any American of means would invest.   The whole point of capitalism is to allow for the accumulation of wealth right?  Why wouldn’t he buy more barns?

Jesus tells us two things.  First, none of us can bank on tomorrow.  Second the whole point of wealth accumulation is to share it, give it away,

Nor is the Christian view of money about doing without, as the slogan above implies.  There is nothing wrong with lots of resources.   If our hearts manage them for others, rather than becoming cooped by them, then we’re in a right place.  The Bible tells us to save for both reasons:   so that we are prepared for hard times and so that we have margin to be able to bless others.  

“look at an ant. Watch it closely; let it teach you. . .  All summer it stores up food; at harvest it stockpiles provisions.  If you don’t do this poverty will knock at your door.       Prov.6:6-11

 Dishonest money dwindles away, but whoever gathers money little by little makes it grow.                                                                                                                                            Proverbs 13:11 (NIV 2011)

According to the US Census Bureau in 2012 only 38 % of Americans had an emergency savings account while

25% had no savings at all.   Saving is the key to ending the debt cycle.

Are any of the following savings steps ones that you might be able to take?

Decide to save even if you are in debt

Pray:  Ask God to show you where to find margin in your budget

Give a % to the Lord

Choose an amount to save, no matter how small and start

Wait 30 days before any major purchase

Put all change in a jar and deposit it quarterly

Pay off your car, continue the payments putting them into savings,

wait three years, then trade your car in for a used car

Use it up, wear it out.  Make due, or do without.

Examine Yourselves

February 7, 2016
Pastor Jeff Lampl

"Examine your motives, test your heart, come to this meal in holy awe."
1 Corinthians 11:28 (Msg)

As you read the Apostle Paul’s instructions from Jesus regarding the Lord’s Supper, consider the meaning of what Jesus is saying. 

First, remember what God is like.   Can you imagine?  Why in the world would the Creator of the universe do this?

Second, consider the consequences of trusting God and following Jesus.  Drinking from the cup that Jesus drank from means following Him to the cross.  We can expect to suffer. 

Third, we live in hope.   No amount of suffering, nor even death itself has the last word.   As John Donne wrote in 1609, “Death be not proud, though some have called thee mighty and dreadful, thou art not so.  . .  . .one short sleep past, we wake eternally.   death, thou shalt die”

Let me go over with you again exactly what goes on in the Lord’s Supper and why it is so centrally important. I received my instructions from the Master himself and passed them on to you. The Master, Jesus, on the night of his betrayal, took bread. Having given thanks, he broke it and said,

"This is my body, broken for you.
Do this to remember me."

After supper, he did the same thing with the cup:

"This cup is my blood, my new covenant with you.
Each time you drink this cup, remember me."

"What you must solemnly realize is that every time you eat this bread and every time you drink this cup, you reenact in your words and actions the death of the Master. You will be drawn back to this meal again and again until the Master returns. You must never let familiarity breed contempt."

1 Corinthians 11:23-26

Yes to the Freedom of God's Enough

February 6, 2016
Pastor Jeff Lampl

"if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content"
1 Timothy 6:8

How I handle my money is not a money management issue.  It is a character issue.

How I handle my money is not about good credit, it is about credibility.  Credibility with God, credibility with my creditors, credibility with those watching me, and credibility with myself.

We Christians are told by Jesus that He is remaking us.   He is working the angles of our lives to transform us from consumers into givers, because God is a giver and it is in that image that we are created.   As consumers we lose our soul, as givers we find it.

So, why save?   Why get out of debt?  The goal is not to be debt free.   If that were the goal, then any money management system along with some big gifts, a few raises, and a little bit of luck can achieve that.   In fact , if becoming debt free is your only goal you can expect that God will not rush in with a miraculous monetary intervention.    God wants to transform you, not just your financial position.   God wants your heart to turn toward others.   That’s why paying off your debts matters.   That takes long term faithfulness just like God’s is eternally faithful.   That takes caring more about your creditors than about yourself.  That makes you credible even if your credit score suffers.  

What God ultimately wants is to use any means possible to transform you into a person who lives joyfully, gratefully and lovingly with what you have right now, not when you get that one more thing that you have to have to supplement the deficit that you think God leaves you with.

Can you say it, “I have enough”?   Can you say, “Because the Lord is my God I have everything I need”?  Can you say,   “If I never have anything more than I have right now, I will have had more than enough for a full and joyful life on earth”?  

Yet even that does not fully encompass God’s aim, which is so clearly stated when God pushed the reset button with humanity.  We are created to bless others with that with which we have been blessed.

“And all the families of the earth will be blessed through you”   Genesis 12:3

Are you growing in your ability to say, “The Lord has blessed me not only with enough, but also in such a way that I am so grateful to Him that I am able to bless others with the blessings I have been blessed”?

“Lord, your goal for me and for each of us is so lofty, so much grearter than I can imagine, especially when I think about how my money management falls into the category of wanting just a little bit more for myself, instead of wanting to give away as much as I can for You Lord and for Kingdom purposes.  Yet if that’s what this money thing is all about, I’m in.  I look forward to how my bank statement will be a witness to my heart for you.  .  Amen”.

How God "Spoke" to Me This Morning

February 5, 2016
Pastor Jeff Lampl

How God "Spoke" To Me This Morning

"The fruit of the Spirit is....self-control."
Galatians 5:22, 23

I was having a bad morning, so in order to make my morning better I went to Dunkin’ Donuts.   Doing that always makes things worse of course, but only after it makes me happy for a few brief moments.  

At the same time I was thinking about the main point of Sunday’s sermon which addresses the topic of what the Bible teaches about debt and saving. It became crystal clear to me that the whole point is self-control,  a major sign that the Holy Spirit is at work.

So I finished the donut I was eating and as I did a song came onto the radio, 88.3 FM, “Hello, My Name is Regret”, which of course is exactly what I experience every time I succumb to temptation, immediate gratification, self-indulgence, and quick fixes that never fix anything.

So, as I finished off the last two donuts (they’re cheaper by the half dozen after all) and my hot chocolate, I contemplated my encounter with the Lord.  I wondered, “if I am exhibiting almost no self-control (I could have order a dozen donuts but didn’t) can I consider myself Spirit filled given the fact that the Spirit filled life results in self-control”.  I further contemplated my wallet, now almost $10.00 emptier because of my lack of self-control. 

So, there you have it.  A case study in how God communicates as well as in how it works.   God will not place a remote control mechanism in me that He can activate to prevent me from selfish, reckless indulgence.  HOWEVER, God has given me (and to every believer) the Holy Spirit, who will speak (see above) and empower, BUT only when I “prime the pump”, only when I believe, trust, act, and do so on pure faith that God is enough.  

Feeling crummy this morning I could have decided God is enough and that donuts won’t help.  I could have said no.  After having said no, having returned to work, trusting that God will help me in my need more than fresh, delicious, sumptuous (Satan is tempter!) French Crullers with the perfect blend of Hot Chocolate ever would or could,  it is at that point that the Holy Spirit kicks in with encouragement (way to go, Jeff, you’re becoming more Christlike) and with strength (I can be grateful for the yogurt and seeds that Kathy that God through Kathy provides for me)   

So, now I know what to say about debt and spending on Sunday!

“Lord, forgive me for relying on myself, my desires, my shortcuts, my immediate gratifications.  You have given me all that I need.  With the help of your Spiirt I will say no to short cuts and yes to whatever you allow to come my way as part of your training me to become a trusting Christlike follower of you.  Amen”

Reaching

Reaching
by Megann Graf

I am constantly reminded of how I so easily fall into the habit of confusing myself with God.  Now, before you think, “what an arrogant thing to say,” let me clarify.  Look at the picture above.  When I initially look at this picture, my mind goes to someone, some human being, reaching for God.  It looks to me like they have reached a place where they know they need God, and so they are turning to Him to hold on to.  That’s not a bad thing, right?   We do all need to acknowledge that we need Jesus, right?  But, what if I have that wrong?  What if that hand is God’s?  What if He is the one that is waiting, but not just when things are bad or hard.   He’s always waiting.   See, while I know this is true, I struggle living that all the time.  I forget that God is there, all the time, waiting for me.  I often feel like that hand reaching out is mine.  I forget that in those moments when I’m not reaching, that He is.  He always has been.  He always will be. 

This week we will sing a song during Communion, and it is another reminder of how, while a relationship with God is a two way street, my part of the “doing” is really not “doing” anything.  It’s an acceptance of love.  It’s an acceptance of the realization, that even if I do nothing, He’s still there for me.  I won’t have nearly the benefits in life that I would if I were in better communion with Him, but He is not turning His back on me regardless of what I do.  This is humbling to me, because it “puts me in my place.”  It reminds me that no matter how much or how little I do, it does not get me more of God’s love.  I have an everlasting Father who loves me and is reaching to me, regardless of whether I am reaching for Him.  He runs to me whether I am on the path going towards Him, or on the path going away from Him. 

I don’t know about you, but I think that’s comforting and crazy all at the same time.  I must constantly remind myself that the hand that is ALWAYS reaching out is not my hand, it is His.  My life is in His hands and He wants me to know and understand and feel His unending love for me. 

If you want to listen to the song- hopefully this link will work but if not, check out “Everlasting Father” by Elevation Worship on YouTube. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFeWsKUiVTE